The Power of Being Present
Perspective From a Hopeful Mum
It’s 12:30 and the countdown until the boys get off the school bus is already on.
Has the laundry been folded?
Is the dishwasher running?
Are dinner plans set?
What time are their karate classes tonight?
When will the husband be home, and did he have a late lunch or will he be starving?
Ugh. My mind is spinning.
These are some pretty common strains of thought, right? There are - at any one time - five to ten things on your list of things to get done. You may be juggling work, attending kids’ activities, doing household chores, keeping track of finances, checking in on family and friends, and all of this while trying to maintain focus.
Despite all of the things that make up the day, there is a push (perhaps even more so now in this 21st century world) to focus on the moment.
You may feel called to somehow balance EVERYTHING. Yes - that was a big ol’ yell!
But you don’t have to walk the tightrope that so many try to, and that may be the point that is the most important. Deep down, you too must yearn for deeper conversation with friends and for clearer purpose in life.
So, there has to be a way for you to focus on the beauty all around you and the people that make your soul sing. But how do you get to a point where you are able to focus on people and tasks that you truly care about?
What is the Science of Being Present?
A quick search on Google brings up so many articles on mindfulness, being present, and the ability to focus. Turns out, it isn’t just a bunch of mumbo-jumbo and Buddhist monks ‘ohm-ing’. There are studies that have been done to show that breathing exercises that focus on diaphragm movement and other external sensory details can change your brain - for the better!
“Contrary to our hypothesis, no significant ERP changes were observed immediately after the 8-week intervention. However, after 6 months of mindfulness training, participants demonstrated ERP changes clustered at left occipitoparietal sites indicative of enhanced sensory processing.”1
This article has a lot of BIG words in it - and I encourage you to check it out in the sources down at the bottom, but what I am pulling away is that this practice of changing the way the mind works takes time. This is not a quick fix, but a lifestyle hack that 21st century people need! And it isn’t just about being able to focus on a task - it is also about fueling our physical bodies more mindfully.
Check out this article from Harvard Health. Mindfulness with food2 is a huge point of concern for men and women! I struggled with bulimia for YEARS, and am finally at a point where focusing on what I put into my body is starting to come more easily.
What does the Bible say about mindfulness and being present?
You may not wonder about this, but I do. I love studying the Bible, and while all 66 books in it may not be riveting, it is amazing to see what strikes my friends and me when we open it up.
Romans 12:2 says, “Do not conform to the power of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
Do not conform to the power of this world -
You don’t have to let your eyes be focused on 10 different things at once! Netflix, Facebook, text messages, Marco Polo videos, Pinterest and e-mails may all be readily available at your fingertips, but does that mean you need to see them all right now?
…but be transformed by the renewing of your mind -
You can close your eyes for five minutes and think about the air flowing into your lungs or the sound of the birds chirping on the other side of your window.
You can work on memorizing a verse of scripture that calms and encourages you, then repeat that verse several times a day.
Don’t know what verses to even read? Use Google for something good! I love searching verses online, and a lot of times I just type in a phrase and AI steps in to help with the next step. Here is a link that will take you to 10 Bible verses that might just be the ones you need to see today.
Studying scripture might just be the way to renew your mind.
Why is this call to live in the moment important?
Summer will officially end on September 22nd this year, and the season that is sometimes considered to be the easy, slow time (cue Ella Fitzgerald singing) is actually the busiest for many. My family has pictures and mileage clocked on our van to prove that we crossed national and international borders. Our boys attended three different camps. Our calendar was booked out months in advance. It was a fast-paced summer. So now, as the beauty of autumn foliage just begins to show, I am grateful for the chance to take a deep breath and fall into some steadier routines that let me slow down. You are too - I just know it.
According to Forbes Advisor3, Americans get about a week and a half of paid time off each year. Just 11 days to plan vacations, schedule doctor appointments, and figure out what to do for unexpected time off for their kids or emergencies.You wake up, work, care for kids, manage a home, go to sleep, and do it all over again the next day. Somewhere in there - hopefully - is the chance to seek out beauty and maybe even some solitude. This won’t happen unless you make it a daily practice. You want to use each day in a beautifully productive way. But how?
What is stopping you from living in the here and now?
You sit down to focus on a project and five other things pop up, right? I say ‘you,’ but really I mean ‘I’ - this cannot just be a me thing though. I sat down to try and write yesterday and kept popping back up.
Oh, I need a drink!
Ugh… now I have to pee.
Whoops! Should renew my MOPS membership now.
Look! Sara is messaging me on Marco Polo.
The laundry needs to get switched over - better go do that.
So, what is stopping you from living in the present?
Could it be these distractions that are listed above, or are you muddled in your own thoughts? A list of five things that float through my brain in a span of five minutes may be too embarrassing to type out here.
The everyday responsibilities will take you away from living in the here and now, they may even stop you from seeing beauty and feeling gratitude.
But many moms will also admit that the things that occupy their minds are also self-inflicted extras.
You signed up to serve on PTA again this year, didn’t you?
The kids’ activities have you hoppin’ six nights a week, don’t they?
Your Pinterest scrolling leads to meals that take way too much prep, right?
The pile of parenting books beside your bed never seems to get read, am I right?
You want to have meaningful time with your spouse, but how does one even do that?
Who needs you to live in the present?
It is now 2:30 PM here as I tap out these ideas - these thoughts that have been bouncing around in my head for two weeks. My boys will be home from school in just a bit, and when they get off the bus this now quiet house will be much louder. It’s ironic because as I sit here, wanting to talk about living in the present, I am pushing back on the arrival of the very people who I should be excited to be present with!
So who needs you to live in the present and be mindful of the here and now?
A challenge for you, and for me - right here!
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)
May you - and I - focus on beautiful moments today, on this last day of Summer. I am expecting something special, if we can both focus on one person or moment…one at a time.3
___________________________________________
Sources
Isbel, B., Weber, J., Lagopoulos, J. et al. Neural changes in early visual processing after 6 months of mindfulness training in older adults. Sci Rep 10, 21163 (2020). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-020-78343-w
Godman, Heidi. “Overeating? Mindfulness Exercises May Help.” Nutrition, Harvard Health Publishing, 8 Mar. 2022, www.health.harvard.edu/blog/overeating-mindfulness-exercises-may-help-202203282714
Baluch, Anna. "Average PTO In The US & Other PTO Statistics (2023)." Forbes Advisor, 30 Mar. 2023, www.forbes.com/advisor/business/pto-statistics/#:~:text=The%20average%20American%20worker%20gets,service%20increases%20to%2015%20days.&text=After%2010%20years%20of%20service%2C%20it%20rises%20again%20to%2017%20days Accessed 21 Sept. 2023.
One at a time: the unexpected way God wants to use you to change the world. Idleman - Baker Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group - 2022